The Bo Show

A Question You Should Never Ask at a Bar

Every now and then something happens in my personal life that just screams out “blog about me.” This past Thursday night, one of these “blog about me” moments happened.

It was a typical Thurs. night, finished dinner, watched AC360 and completed my crunches. I got a text message from my new buddies Amit and Brian… time to hit up our neighborhood bar for some beers and good conversation.

I’m going to make a long story short. I was sitting at the bar chatting with my friends when this guy, a guy I have had conversations with in the past approached me. He’s an actor, who really likes talking about himself - which actor doesn’t? After hearing him explain about his jet setting to the west coast three to four times a week, he asked me a question… “BO, can I ask you a question.”

I’m always up for interesting conversation, I replied, “sure, go!” Then he got all nervous and said, “I’ll ask you later.” I had a feeling I knew where this was going, so I replied, “No worries.” I turned to my friends and continued having fun.

About seven minutes later (love the specific time frame?), he was up against me again, “Can I ask you a question?” This time I was a little more frank, “Sure, this must be some question… go for it!” He looked me in the eye and said, “You don’t get offended easily do you?” I said, “That’s the question, dumb question.” “No, it takes a lot to offend me.” He said, “Oh, wrong answer.”

Jesus… what is up with the guy right?!? Looking confused, I said, “Are you testing me?” I was thinking, get the hell out of here. I wanted to have fun with me friends. He then said, “I’ll ask you the real question later.”

Long story turning short, I was putting on my jacket, ready to leave the bar for the evening… it was about 2:00. He came running up to me. “BO, can I ask you my question.” I said, “Jesus… ask me this question already.” He came real close and whispered in my ear, “I heard you don’t like 69ing.” Wow, that was some line… right? I replied, “That’s not a question, it’s a statement.” Followed up with “That’s something only guys who date me get to know.” He then said, “Why aren’t we 69ing right now?” Again, wow… I laughed. He looked me dead in the eye, “Why are you laughing, no, really, lets go.”

Finally, I said, “I really like the guy I’m dating right now.” He lifted up his left hand and showed me a ring on his ring finger. He said, “Well, I have a husband.” My response… “Well, I clearly like the guy I’m dating more than you like your husband.”

I played it off and made my way out of the bar. But, what really gets me here is… it’s moments like these that hurt our community. There are so many of us trying our hardest to get equal rights. So many of us are trying to get gay marriage legalized in the United States. I know straight men and women can stray and cheat on their spouses. But, since we don’t have the right to marry, the burden is on us. It is unfortunate, but we have a spotlight on our relationships. Until our relationships are taken seriously and viewed as “real” commitments, we may never have equal rights. To me, that means we must be true to ourselves and our partners.

Just sayin’